by Olipophatbaby | Feb 12, 2018 | New Mum Mondays
Hello my name is Elizabeth and I hope you enjoy my story, and please share with anyone this could help!
Nearly 2 years ago I got a diagnosis we all dread. Cancer. Invasive lobular breast cancer. 36 years old. single mum to two young children. And about to lose so much of what makes me a woman.
Over the course of the next year, I would undergo a double mastectomy, 6 months of chemotherapy, oophorectomy to remove my ovaries, reconstructive surgery and ongoing medical treatment. I lost weight, lost my hair, lost my eyelashes and it felt like I was losing my mind!
But throughout my treatment, I carried on working for my charity Kicks Count as much as I could and 8 weeks after my ovary surgery I climbed Ben Nevis to raise money.
People were amazed I could carry on with such strength. I had breast cancer! I should be taking it easy! So why was I pushing myself so hard?
My answer…
Toby.
My baby. The baby I buried. If anything was going to break me, that was it.
8 years ago I went into hospital pregnant with my son and I left with empty arms. I went from feeling little tiny feet kicking to rubbing an empty belly. And after leaving the hospital things didn’t get any better. There were post-mortem results, the funeral, burying the ashes, visiting the grave, seeing pregnant women and babies everywhere and trying to maintain some degree of normality for my daughter.
At that point, I could barely get out of bed, let alone climb a mountain. The pain was like nothing I had ever experienced, or could ever have imagined.
But somehow I got through. I got up every day and I put one foot in front of the other. Eventually, I found a way to turn my grief into something positive.
I volunteered for Kicks Count (called Count the Kicks at the time) and eventually went on to become CEO. I felt so strongly that this would work, that this would help. The UK has one of the worst stillbirth rates in the developed world, a third of which occur after 37 weeks when the baby is considered full term. The majority of Mums who have a stillbirth noticed a change in their baby’s movements beforehand as a baby in distress tends to slow their movements 12 to 48 hours before they pass away. Kicks counts had a very simple message…Report any change in your babies movements immediately. In Norway this simple message had helped reduce their stillbirth rate by 50%. All we needed to do was make every single pregnant woman aware of Kicks Count.
But while the message is simple, getting it through to mums who are bombarded with out of date advice, old wives tales and commercial websites spouting whatever myths they like is amazingly difficult. But nothing was going to stop me trying.
Not even Cancer.
Now my hair is growing back, my scars are healing, but nothing will ever bring back my son. But every message we get that a baby is here because of kicks count is a little fist bump in his honour.
If you know anyone who is pregnant please let them know about Kicks Count, from me and Toby. x
Elizabeth Hutton
by Olipophatbaby | Feb 6, 2018 | Motherhood
Today marks the day where some women were given the right to vote. 100 years ago women who were over the age of 30 and either owned land themselves or were married to men with property were given the right to vote.
Part of me feels proud for this, but another part of me feels angry that this wasn’t a birthright as it was for many men, and the right to cast ballet was still discriminated by class and wealth. However, 100 years ago set in motion the steps for the universal woman’s suffrage, a decade that help brings change and give all women the right to vote.
This was a historic change for the women, yet it still angers me, that we, as women, are still not seen as equal (I am talking the mass here, not the minority). Don’t get me wrong, there are industries where a woman is treated equally as a man. But then, we look at industries and sectors that our children grow up and listen to and learn from. Politics, for example, female politicians still remain the minority in ELECTED positions of power. Is this because politics is still a mans world? And this world is one that governs our country!
Where will we be in the next hundred years? All I know is that this is an exciting time for our children and our children’s children! I made my girls watch Oprah’s speech, they asked questions to do with men, women, race, why people were treated differently when we are all born the same. These are the questions I want to champion and felt proud that my children were asking.
So I salute the Emily Davison’s, the Emmeline Pankhurst’s, the Flora Drummond’s and the suffragettes of the past present and future. The MEN and women that help and continue to fight for equal rights in sex, race and religion.
We are living in an exciting and vibrant time.
Lots of love
Jess oxox
by Olipophatbaby | Feb 5, 2018 | New Mum Mondays
Hi! My name is Naomi. I’m first and foremost a Mummy but I’m also owner of PicPop (www.picpop.co.uk) – an online store for kids and Mums.
I sell a variety of kids’ accessories and most recently have developed my own natural wax candle range for Mums – The Mama Mantra collection. I started PicPop after I had my little girl, Sienna, who is now 2……going on 22! Coming from an entrepreneurial family, I think it was in my blood to create something of my own but I also wanted to be in control of my working life so that I can balance my work around Sienna and see her as much as possible, especially in these precious early years.
Sadly, my relationship with Sienna’s Dad didn’t work out and I quickly came to realise that being a Mummy can be one lonely job. Hell, being a Mummy can be lonely even if you do have a partner! Changing nappies, clearing up, and playing shops leaves little space for ‘me-time’ in any Mum’s daily schedule. It was this that was the inspiration for the Mama Mantra candle collection. I wanted to create something that empowered Mums and reminded them of what an amazing job they are doing. Each candle features a different mantra about motherhood and the scent was developed to reflect that mantra. The candles are made from a natural wax so you can burn them without worrying that you or your family is inhaling any nasties or toxins too!
Bringing up a child is the most difficult yet rewarding role on the planet and we can often feel like we lose ourselves in the process. I wouldn’t be able to get through it without other Mums support around me either. So I designed my candles with that in mind too. The candles not only act as a token of appreciation for yourself but for those amazing women around you that you couldn’t live without. I hope that every Mum can take a #MamaMoment to show themselves some self-love.
Follow Naomi and Pic Pop on Instagram @Shoppicpop
website www.picpop.co.uk
by Olipophatbaby | Jan 31, 2018 | Lifestyle, Motherhood
Ok, Ok, so it is fair to say that my Kim Kardashian Instagram post got a fair bit of traction. 70% of the comments were in agreeance, 5% were neutral, 5% were asking why Instagram was parenting my friends child (yes, even I wondered if these comments were serious and looking at corresponding profile pictures, cleary these people couldn’t understand the content of the post) and the other 20% were from die-hard Kardashian fans!
So, from reading the comments, I wanted to address a few of the points. The points being:
- “Why does a 13-year-old have a phone in the first place and what are they doing on Instagram?”
Now, I may be wrong, and this may be an assumption but I am assuming the people who have written the comments like this don’t have children and don’t know teenagers of this age. I get this assumption as a 13-year-old, would be in year 9, starting to choose their GCSE, going round to their friend’s house, starting to get a little bit more independent, and part of that independence is having a phone so your parents can get hold of you. All of my friends who have kids that are 13+ have phones, and so do the majority of their friends.
Now, imagine back to when you were 13…. well, all my friends were allowed to wear, make-up, whereas I had to sneak my lipgloss and mascara in the role of my skirt and put it on in the school toilets. This is also the age I started getting embarrassed talking to boys, started getting influenced by my friends (AS WELL AS my parents) and used to get really excited when I got a text message on my Nokia3210 and then disappointed that I couldn’t reply as I hadn’t bought my £10 top-up card!
A phone is the first start of independence for a teenager, and the 5 people you surround yourself with are the people that influence you the most. In childhood and also adult hood!
2.” Its up to you to parent your children, not Kim Kardashian or Instagram”.
Again, the people who write comments like this are just plain idiotic. Of course, it is a parents job to parent the child, but part of that parenting is giving your child independence, trust and faith that they have listened to your advice. However, a part of being a child/teenager and growing up is making mistakes, learning, problem-solving and thinking your parents do not know best.
There were also a few comments that said: “Kim didn’t ask to be a role model”….
Surely, part of being a being a celebrity, you realise that you are a role model and especially when you have 103,000,000 followers? When you are on TV there are always going to be people who look up to you, just like there are always going to be people who just plain don’t like you.
I understand this, and I only have 41,000 followers. But, I understand that I may or may not influence someone and I hope that if I do, it is positive.
3. “Kim looks fantastic, and I think its great that she is so body confident after 3 kids”
Yes, Kim does look great, But so would a lot of people of they had bum implants, breast surgery, liposuction, lip fillers, botox and other various cocktails of image altering surgery. Have people forgotten this is not normal to have so much surgery? Kyle Jenner, had lip fillers at 17 – is this not worrying? When people have cosmetic surgery it is generally due to low self-esteem to do with that part of the body. I am not against surgery if it can boost your self-esteem and it is a thought-out process and not one trying to be perfect, then bloody go for it! PERFECTION DOES NOT EXIST!!!!!
What I am against is the constant influnce of this being pushed on young women. Is it a coincidence that everyone os starting to look the samer? Or is it the influnec of social media and celebrity?
I also want to get this straight, I am not saying or suggesting that I am against lingerie shoots, or even fully naked photo shoots, what I am saying is: as an influencer to those that follow us, surely we have a responsibility that we are being the best role model that we can. The two images below have two very different meanings, tones and feeling. I know which one I prefer! What I am saying is learn your audicence.
Clemmie Telford is a mum blogger, and her following is of mums, parents and mainly women who have had children and been pregnant or are pregnant.
If you are parent, what are your thoughts on this? Are we championing the right role models? Is this picture ok?
Lots of love
Jess
by Olipophatbaby | Jan 29, 2018 | Motherhood, New Mum Mondays
Hi, I’m Charlotte, a former party girl and now mother to two toddlers!
Until recently I was a full-time Primary school teacher striving to be the best teacher, mother and wife 24/7…but that wasn’t happening, something was going to give. I made the decision to leave teaching and become a full time, stay at home Mum…but something niggled me when I left. This niggle was the fact that so many children are starting school unprepared for the challenges ahead of them and I felt like I couldn’t help them now.
So I set up The Mummy Formula. Through the power of Instagram and using my background in education, I want to provide inspiration for mums and dads, on every sort of budget (usually free!), with fun and exciting activities that enable their children to develop and grow every day.
I want our children to achieve in life and giving them the best start is paramount. The formula consists of Learning with Mummy, Cooking with Mummy, Making with Mummy and Days Out with Mummy… obviously these activities are suitable for dads too, I’m not being sexist!! The final, crucial part of the formula is getting time for yourself, whether it be a night out, a shopping trip or going out and getting some fresh air. I hope that my material inspires parents to get creative with their children and that lasting memories are made through the fun activities.
Lots of love
Charlotte x
Instagram: @themummyformula
